HOW DO YOU CO PARENT WHEN YOUR PARTNER HAS ALL OF THESE OPINIONS?
Katherine + Nick North by Documentary Family Photographer Yan Palmer
Something that I think is super interesting is that there are all these places in life where it’s become socially acceptable to give unsolicited advice to people, just because we want to.
Some examples you ask?
When a couple get’s married we tell them “Don’t go to bed angry” or some other equally silly piece of advice that is supposed to equal years of blissful matrimony.
A kid goes off to college, starts their first real career job or makes their first royal fuck up and we offer sage advice without an invite.
Someone is pregnant with their first baby and we don’t think twice about saying “Enjoy your sleep now! Because you’re about to give it up for the next 15-25 years”
Believe me as someone who has been pregnant 4 times and having always looked to be about 19, I have heard SCADS of unsolicited advice.
BUT THERE’S ONE PIECE OF ADVICE I WOULD HAVE WELCOMED THAT HASN’T COME MY WAY
No one has ever looked me straight in the eyes and said, “Co-parenting is going to be a mother fucker!”
BECAUSE CO PARENTING IS HARD!
Why did no one say? “You’ll be more frustrated about this than almost anything else in your relationship. But remember to hear each other, really listen, past the fear, and to the value you are trying to teach, focus on that rather than the very specific path you think you should take to get there and you’ll be okay”
Nope just some BS about “how the days are long but the years are short.”
So let me tell you.
Parenting is HARD!
Parenting with another human who is fully engrossed in all of it, with thoughts and opinions about the right and wrong way to go about everything because they really care is REALLY FUCKING HARD and then add in blended families and the kids other dad’s and we have a lot of cooks in the kitchen up in here.
AND YET!
Because every single one of us loves the crap out of our kids and would do anything for them we all focus on the values and skills we want these kids of ours to have and we really listen to each other, and the things that are triggering our fears.
EASIER SAID THAN DONE!!!
SO WE MADE YOU A VIDEO TO SHOW YOU WHAT THAT LOOKS LIKE FOR KATHERINE AND I.
WE AREN’T THERAPISTS! BUT WE’VE GOT ONE!
AS ALWAYS THANKS FOR WATCHING, SUBSCRIBING, SHARING, + COMMENTING.
We’re having so much fun making these new videos, please hit us up if you have any ideas for topics or questions you’d like answered!